I don’t really know anything about myself other than what appears to happen in each moment.

There is no imperative or desire that can get you any closer to or reveal what is already here.

Force will not reveal anything, contemplative or otherwise. The transition from clenched fist to open hand reveals the emptiness of everything, releases misguided effort and simply allows whatever may emerge, painful or not.

‘This’ is undeniable yet inexpressible.

The bottomless well of present being is all we can really draw upon.

I consider myself blessed and grateful for having very little imagination.

Forever reaching for the light, bliss, joy etc. does not ensure their realisation. Instead it almost always keeps them forever out of reach. These things just happen whether we want them to or not.

I am not a thing in the world; I am the space in which the world is happening.

Richard Lang

Get out of your own way…

Everything is included and necessary, particularly the profound trauma that was the catalyst for this transformative process.

Came across these journal entries from a year ago today:

The specifics of where I am, and what I do are irrelevant. I am always right here, right now riding the irresistible, ungraspable wave of being — out of where I know not and where to a mystery yet to be revealed.

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This realisation is like becoming a monk in the monastery of the world. For a traditional monk huge swathes of life are pre-dealt with and need no consideration.

Recognising that this is also true for ‘ordinary’ people in the midst of ‘ordinary’ life can be seen by giving up control to the universe — which in truth was already the case anyway and was merely occluded by ignorance.

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I don’t find it helpful to think in terms of being one thing as opposed to another. Awakened or not awakened? Who cares? A pointless query that seems to demand a definitive answer, to force us one way instead of another. To what end? Enlightened or not? I have no idea and don’t care for such superficial, arbitrary distinctions and labels.

There comes a time when, if you come to recognise, accept and are grateful for the truth of your own unique and personal aliveness, that everything else falls into place automatically and spontaneously and is taken care of without any effort on your part. Nothing needs to be done as you find yourself simply happening…

At a certain point you realise that without knowing someone (as well as it is possible to do so) there is no advice one person can give to another.

Your own way, your own instinctive energy of movement is more important than any one particular school of thought or practice. There are many wise and useful insights to be gleaned from across the diverse and wide spectrum of traditions as well as contemporary contemplative work. Yet, always trust yourself, have faith in what you find yourself moved to do above all else. Your own unique truth is ultimately the only realisation worth living.

What is actually happening is beyond doubt yet cannot be expressed.

You talk when you cease to be at peace with your thoughts.

Kahlil Gibran

Looking back over the last two or three years, if there is anything that could be said to have happened I suppose it has been a gradual process of relaxing and letting go…

Recognition, acceptance and gratitude for impermanence and inseperability.

As a country, and in the family of origin, people talk about the tragedy of the thousands who die of fentanyl overdoses while finishing off their fourth glass of wine while popping another THC gummy. But that’s a whole other conversation…

Carl Jung: Individuation and Recovery

Stumbled across poet d. a. levy for the first time. An extraordinary character.

if you want a revolution

return to your childhood

and kick out the bottom…

…this is not a game

your childhood

is the foundation

of the system…

d. a. levy – extracts from the poem ‘Tombstone as a Lonely Charm’